This is my first entry and I feel a little nervous writing for all of you. I still have a mind that tells me if I’m not the best I’m the worst – so why bother. That is basically the mentality I’ve carried throughout my life on this earth. Manifestations of self hate and low self esteem are common for addicts, and now is the time I should mention that I am a recovering addict. It’s been almost two years since something happened to me I’m sure many thought was impossible. I was given a choice again; to go on living in an endless cycle of street crime, disease and despair, or get clean. I sit here today alive, clean and free sharing this with you, not because of anything I feel I did. It’s actually abundantly clear to me that my ideas do not work. Once I was able to get out of my own way, kill my ego and try anything other that what I had planned for myself, I then could experience freedom and begin to feel the joy of the life I know I and many others like me were born to live. Somebody shared with me that a grateful addict will not use. I strive today to live gratefully and humbly in this world I used to curse. My name is Nick.R and I look forward to sharing more of my journey of recovery with anybody willing to listen.
Nick’s First Blog